Monday, May 08, 2006

Legislators vote on superlatives, sign legislative manuals

Top: Legislators swap legislative manuals
Bottom: The infamous Leventis inscription

Lawmakers honor end-of-session traditions

B & P News - Columbia

The excitement was palpable on State House grounds last week, where lawmakers eagerly anticipate the end of the 2nd session of the 116th General Assembly and the beginning of Summer-Fall Break. One sign of the imminent vacation was a special joint session to vote on superlatives and start the month-long process of legislative manual signing.

“When Mike Fair signs your legislative manual ‘R.H.T.S. – Raise Hell This Summer,’ you know that folks are getting giddy for the session to end,” said Rep. Chip Limehouse, who was voted “Breast All Around” by his peers for his sponsorship of the public breastfeeding bill. “And everyone knows to watch out for Senator Leventis and his patented filibuster inscription.”

Senator Glenn McConnell, voted “Most Likely to Secede” for the fifth year in a row, said he is excited about obtaining signatures in his legislative manual, as he has for over twenty years

“[Rep.] Bobby [Harrell] always has something funny to write,” said McConnell. “Last year, he signed in the crease and wrote, ‘I wanted to be the first one to sign your crack.’ Man, sometimes I wish I was in the other chamber.”

The tradition of signing legislative manuals is as old as the legislative manual itself, and some inscriptions even provide historians insight about the mechanics of the Palmetto State’s legislative body.

“Old, signed legislative manuals can provide obscure details about the nature of legislative alliances, even some across party lines,” said USC history professor Calvin “Cal” Hoone. “But more often than not, the only information you get is who farted in what sub-committee meeting.”

Pundits speculate that this year’s most sought-after inscription will be the farewell message by Rep. John Graham Altman. Altman, who is not seeking re-election, was awarded the distinction of “Very Brightest” by his colleagues.


Earl Capps said...

That is one of your best postings yet. Great story!

Anonymous said...

hilarious! seriously.