Tuesday, March 21, 2006

New Top Ten

Palpable PBS bias has Sanford acting
like a big yellow bird

Lately the idea has been Bandied about that Mark Sanford is afraid to get his feathers ruffled in a debate with GOP challenger Oscar Lovelace. Sanford responded to Lovelace’s debate challenge earlier this month by saying “Maybe in June,” then abruptly changing his answer to “No way” -- a waffle so huge it almost earned him the ambassadorship to Belgium on the spot.

So what is it? Is the 'champion of choice' choosing the chicken route or just lamely ducking the debate? Let's find out.


Top Ten Reasons Sanford Won’t Debate GOP Challenger Oscar Lovelace

10. SC-ETV has overt pro-Oscar bias

9. Proposed Sunday evening debate time at odds with previously scheduled “meet and greet on Wisteria Lane”

8. Not going to waste time badmouthing SC public schools on a program that isn’t even going to be televised nationally

7. Gave up debating for Lent

6. Debate not Sanford’s optimum format, and Lovelace wouldn’t agree to a “big-stupid-chart-off”

5. Lacks constitutional authority to lower flags, debate issues

4. Not Sanford’s job to create debates, just to establish fertile underlying soil conditions from which debatage will naturally occur

3. Worried about being able to list both his accomplishments in a brief, one-hour session

2. Sanford refuses to appear on primetime until networks agree to ban unseemly words like "bitch," "damn," "shit," "unemployment," and "TIME magazine's three worst governors"

1. Fundamental disagreement: Lovelace wants three debates; Sanford needs a pair

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Funny!

I think Jenny won't let him debate!

Anonymous said...

Why spend so much time on insulting Sanford (no matter how you or I feel, he's going to be re-elected). Why not go after some weaker candidates (ex. Andre Bauer)

judge (M.J.) said...

another very funny post. don't let those Sanford guys get you down, okay? This #$@% is hilarious!

Earl Capps said...

Come on, what's wrong with picking on Sanford? I just wish they'd aim some of that satire at the many other asses that are out there, instead of just concentrating their fire on one target.

CCS said...

It's just so easy with Sanford. Not that it's difficult with any of the other stellar Repubs...

Nettie said...

Funny, I used to like waffles. Had 'em for breakfast.